Happy Quarantine Birthday!

No celebration with party guests, your gift this year is house arrest!

"It's your birthday you can cry if you want to! Just do it in your room, I seriously can't take anymore."

Happy Quarantine Birthday!

I am one of the lucky parents who has a child who has the misfortune of celebrating a birthday during quarantine. We have already established in my home that this whole lock down situation is miraculously all my fault. Some mothers may take this as an insult. Just another thing I get blamed for but I say hey my kids must think I have some massive persuasive super powers to take down the whole world is some sort of scheme just to ruin their lives even more. I’m like a God to these children.

Quarantine birthdays mean no friends, no party, no embarrassing songs accompanying scoops of ice-cream brought to your table by singing waiters. If you ask me a nice quiet day at home sounds like the perfect birthday but this apparently is not the case for a teen. So I am the birthday Scrooge, the grinch who stole the birthday wish. So I did what any guilt ridden mother would do and I tried to buy my child’s love with an over priced gift. I sent my husband out at 6am to drive 6 hours round trip to buy and deliver our daughter a car. It kind of worked but I feel there are still many expensive gifts in the future before I truly have her love.

This is still something I don’t understand about birthdays. Why are we celebrating the child? I’m pretty sure it should be my day. I went through the 9 months of being sick, back pain, insomnia, and peeing myself just a little with every step I took. Only to end it with horrible, “I wish I was dead pain,” leaking breasts and a lifetime of peeing myself a little with every step I take. All that for what? Kids that are expensive, messy, and unruly. So I say again, shouldn’t this be my day? I feel like I should be celebrated. Yes child, today is the day I gave you life into this world. You’re welcome! Now wait on me hand and foot in appreciation. I have four kids so I should have four days. This is completely logical. Some may ask if having kids is that bad, why would you have four kids? I never said I was logical.

I do have a fun tip for families out there wanting to change it up a bit or wanting to do something out of the house for a birthday. My family has come up with a pretty amazing idea. We all drive our cars to my parents house where they have a huge screen set up outside their house, they use a projector to play different movies each week. We all park our cars out in front of the screen for our Quarantine drive in theater night. It’s pretty great. If you think being locked in your house with nowhere to go with your rambunctious children is fun, lock them down in a stationary car with you for two hours. No it’s all good as long as you bring lots of snacks and and gummy melatonin. Kids fall asleep about half way through and mama gets a movie night out.

I'll be back tomorrow with more family drama. Until then I'm signing off one Crazy Mad Mama!

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